Relationships (especially romantic ones) are a lot of work. This is undoubtedly true in my own life. After 17 years and two kids, my husband and I have been through loss, heartache, and change. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg compared to people who have been together longer or endured the unimaginable.
But one thing’s for sure: when the heart emojis and fireworks fade away, it takes real commitment and intentional effort to keep moving forward. For a relationship to last, you and your partner need to be aligned on some pretty core ideologies and goals.
Over the years, we’ve written a lot about relationships through the lens of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MTBI). So this blog post is designed to be the ultimate resource for you to bookmark and revisit. Could you use some help resolving conflict with your partner? Do you need guidance before a finance or budgeting discussion? Are you craving some ideas to reignite the spark? You’re in the right place.
Below are links to helpful blog posts, articles, and books. Browse the lists and bookmark this page for future reference.
Six Blog Posts about Personality Type and Relationships
1. How MBTI Type Can Make Us Luckier in Love, Family, and Friendship
Here’s a great starting point for more meaningful connection. This blog post is all about communication, finding common ground, and reevaluating the rules of engagement.
2. How to use Your Myers-Briggs Personality Type for Love, Relationships, and Dating
Lots of lightbulb moments in here. This blog post explains how your unique personality preferences might affect your love life – and explains why you should focus beyond a person’s four-letter type.
3. This is How Compatible You and Your Partner Are, Based on MBTI Type
Any type can be compatible with another. It just takes some self-awareness. This blog post offers pointers for how to recognize and appreciate personality differences.
4. What’s the Best Gift for Each MBTI Personality Type?
Here’s one you’ll want to refer back to over and over again. This blog post is chock-full of unique gift ideas for each of the 16 MBTI types.
5. Vacations to Try for Each Myers-Briggs Type
Sometimes you just need to get away. This blog post offers vacation ideas for each of the 16 MBTI types. Remember, stay safe and don’t forget your mask!
6. How personality insights add understanding to love and relationships
Do opposite types attract? What are the 2 key ways to using MBTI type as a relationship tool? This blog answers these questions and more with detailed INTJ and ENFP examples of a real relationship.
Three Articles about Personality Type and Relationships
1. How Your Financial Personality Impacts Your Relationship, According to Myers-Briggs
Finances can be a HUGE point of contention in relationships. To help people overcome these challenges, The Myers-Briggs Company teamed up with Marcus by Goldman Sachs. Together, you and your partner can determine the most efficient path to reach your financial goals. For example, are you a “confident money manager” or a “laid-back balancer”? Take this free Financial Personality Quiz to help you figure it all out. Could be a fun, unconventional date night idea.
2. A Tale of Opposites: How My Husband and I Make the Most of Our Differing Personalities
Maggie Oglesby is a self-described “Type-A, mile-a-minute gal.” And her husband Charlie is a bit more cool, calm, and collected. In the article she wrote for Myers-Briggs Magazine, Maggie shares some deeply personal stories about how they learned to make things work through a break-up, their son’s hospitalization, and more. Maggie and Charlie are great examples for anyone who needs a sliver of hope for their own relationship.
3. Couples and Personality Type
Perhaps the shortest of the bunch, this article provides a brief but insightful look at why knowledge of personality type is important for relationships. Understanding your MBTI type (and your partner’s) could potentially make or break some key components of your relationship – including intimacy, division of household tasks, children, and so much more. This article from The Myers-Briggs Foundation is a wonderful starting point, and includes several additional resources.
Two Books about Personality Type and Relationships
1. I’m Not Crazy, I’m Just Not You, Dr. Roger R. Pearman and Dr. Sarah C. Albritton
This book explains the nuances of individual personality preferences and how they affect our interactions with others. The authors teach us how to recognize and celebrate personality differences instead of judging them. Here’s a five-star review found on Amazon:
“. . . It's opened my eyes to the vast difference in not only how we are, but also why we are, why we say/do/respond and hear or interpret in the ways we do. If you are suffering from relationship difficulty, this is a real must! Marital or parental, this will transform your thinking and being awareness that you will either utilize to understand and repair or end the conflict and heal from it. Well worth the investment! You won't regret it.” – V.
2. Was That Really Me? How Everyday Stress Brings Out Our Hidden Personality, Dr. Naomi L. Quenk
This book outlines the stress patterns of all 16 personality types. It also includes some startling information on long-term stress – and ways to free yourself from the cycle. Here’s a five-star review:
“Very insightful read. Wonderful addition to the available MBTI literature. Definitely helpful personally, giving me a deeper understanding of myself, and also of the people I am in close relationships with. I'm more gentle on myself now, and more compassionate, because I understand myself better. Better able to understand, be with and help others, as well. Reading this book was definitely time well spent.” – K.
How To Spark More Meaningful Connection With Your Significant Other
At its core, true connection happens when each personality type meets its needs for:
- Discussion and reflection (extraverted and introverted preferences)
- Structure and flexibility (judging and perceiving preferences)
- Reaching conclusions (thinking and feeling preferences)
- Gathering information (sensing and intuition preferences)
The official MBTI is the only way to get an accurate look at you and your partner’s true personality types. If your relationship needs this kind of reset, you can take the assessment today.